Aw, summer love! There’s something about romance during those three magical months that can make you feel like you’ve found the love of your life: picnics in the park, romantic trips to the beach, long strolls down the boulevard holding hands, true bliss. But what happens once that precious free time comes to an end and the reality of your stressful life comes back into play?
Turns out, the key to building a summer fling into a lasting relationship may just lie with your love language. Although having a balance of all five love languages in your relationship is important, each person has a dominant need—and figuring out what it is could be the key to year-round romance. Here are the five love languages and the clues they offer for building a healthy and happy relationship that will last much longer than just the summer!
Words of affirmation
This love language is about expressing love to your significant other through spoken word. Many people feel valued the most when they get to hear the words “I love you,” along with other compliments and affirmative words of praise. It is also important to remember that those who feel loved the most when they hear sweet words also feel more affected by negative comments and arguments. To maintain a happy relationship with this person, it’s important to also keep a level of kindness and be mindful of your words: they’re listening!
To this person, being touched is a necessity in order for them to feel your love. This doesn’t just include acts in the bedroom: it can be as simple as holding hands and sitting closely next to one another. Physical touch creates a sense of security for your partner, so during more serious conversations, or times of stress, be sure to remain close. Long-distance relationships are particularly stressful for them, as are relationships with partners who physically distance themselves or are against occasional PDA.
This love language is all about that special time together. Although you certainly don’t have to give them all your time, when you are with this person it is important that all of your attention is on them. In our society today, this is far easier said than done—but if you're constantly checking your texts or IG feed, your SO will not feel valued or heard. It’s especially important to plan dates with this person: create pockets of time where you can get away from the distractions of daily life and just be together.
Acts of Service
If your SO feels love through acts of service, it’s important to acknowledge that they have a lot going on in their daily life, and offer a helping hand when you can. This individual feels valued the most when their partner recognizes how much they do and wants to help ease their load. This can be done in small acts, such as taking out the garbage, cooking a special dinner, or even just given them a nice foot massage after a long day. This person cannot tolerate laziness and needs someone who can work and contribute at their own fast pace. Actions speak louder than words!
Although we all love a good gift, if this is your love language, it’s important that your partner is a thoughtful shopper. Although this person isn’t necessarily materialistic, they associate love with tangible tokens of appreciation. If your bank account is empty, get creative! Even if it is a flower from your garden or a seashell that you found along the beach that reminded you of them, it’s important that you continue to express your love through meaningful objects.