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Sex & Relationships How queefing (and other experiences) can make sex better

May. 16, 2017
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Anyone who’s ever had sex knows it’s nothing like how it’s portrayed on TV. Both partners don’t always magically cum at the same time. The girl’s makeup isn’t perfectly intact afterwards. Not all couples fit together and find their rhythm right away. Sex can be awkward and sticky and sweaty and messy… and that’s what makes it good! The aspects of sex that some consider embarrassing--like queefing or hairy parts or fumbling limbs--are actually key to having the best sex ever.      

These so-called awkward circumstances can actually lead to more open communication in the bedroom and less stressed sex. And, at the end of the day, isn’t that what we all want?

Queefing  

Yep, vaginas make fart-like sounds when air gets into it. It’s not a big deal! When it happens (and trust me: it’s going to happen), just laugh it off. Whether you or your partner are the queefer, you can make the situation a little less tense by laughing or nudging them in the arm. It creates a sense of comfort and fun, which are two necessary ingredients for bangin’ sex.

Farting

Everyone farts. Some are loud; some are quiet; some smell; some don’t. If it happens during sex, once again, just laugh it off. Getting all embarrassed and closed-off will lead to awkward silences and tense pauses. Let your partner know that you two don’t need to be so serious--and neither does your sex.

Gagging

Some people actually find gagging super hot. So if you find yourself in a position where you are gagging, really work it and see if you or your partner are turned on by it. If you both are, hell yeah! Just make sure you don’t go overboard: gagging may be hot, but dying is not. On the other hand, if you find yourself uncomfortable or not aroused, well, at least you know it’s not for you. Either way, you’ll learn something about your sexual preferences, which is always a good thing. 

Involuntary Grunting

At the time you may be thinking, “Holy shit, did that noise just escape my mouth?!” But it can actually be a good indicator of what you do or don’t like. Just make sure your partner knows whether that was a pleasure grunt or a what the fuck are you doing grunt. If it’s the first, they’ll have a better idea of what lights your fire. If it’s the second, now you both know to stay clear.

Fumbling

Okay, maybe they can’t flip you around into crazy positions while fucking you the entire time. Honestly, though, very few can--and the only way those people got there was by fumbling and bonking heads enough times to figure out how. It’s okay if you have a few awkward run-ins; everyone does, sooner or later, and it just means you’re figuring out the other person’s body. 

Puking

There’s no denying that puking during sex can kill the mood. First things first: don’t beat yourself up about it. It’s happened to people before, and it will happen again. But now you know the point at which you or your partner may need to ease up a little bit to avoid a repeat performance. If you want, just throw in a joke about how big their dick is to make light of the situation!

Period Sex

Do not be ashamed to have sex on your period! For starters, having sex on your period has been known to help with cramps, so get that D (or V). Second, showing how comfortable you are with having sex on your period is a great way to end the stigma around period sex and periods in general… you go, girl! If you’re the period-free partner, chill out. It’s just a little blood--if they can endure having it come out of their body every month for several decades, you can deal with it during sex. However, just be sure to put a towel down so you don’t ruin those sheets!

Pubic Hair

Some people shave or wax, and some people don’t--get over it! If you can’t handle a little pubic hair down there, then maybe you’re not mature enough to be having sex anyway. However, if you want to avoid getting hair in between your teeth, maybe kindly suggest that your partner do a little ‘scaping--for the sake of everyone’s pleasure. 

Sweat

Sex is a workout, and that means sweat is going to be involved. The more you’re sweating, the more you’re working at making that sex bomb, so let it drip, baby. Just be sure to keep some water by the bed to stay hydrated--and maybe some towels to wipe your face off afterwards!