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From our lips to your ears: the Adolescent team's Oscar predictions

Jan. 26, 2018
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This year's Oscar nominations are some of the most diverse and exciting in recent memory: the notoriously straight, white, male Best Director category includes breakout auteurs Greta Gerwig and Jordan Peele; women made impressive headway in both Best Adapted and Best Original Screenplay categories; and the acting slots boasted inclusion of everyone from Daniel Kaluuya to Mary J. Blige... not that any of this helps you if you haven't seen most of this year's movies.

Fortunately, the team here at Adolescent is here to help! Well, sort of. Whether you're  trying to perfect your Academy Awards bracket or just looking to pride yourself on being better-informed than our staff, enjoy Adolescent Content's official slate of Oscar predictions!

Best Picture

RICHELLE: “What is this for? Is there money? Are we placing bets?”
ALLI: “I feel like Three Billboards might win.”
NAOMI: “The Post made me fall asleep.”
CHARLOTTE: “If this was five years ago, Dunkirk would win for sure.”
KEVIN: “Sorry, what were the options?”

Best Actor

KEVIN: “I think Winston Churchill is supposed to win, right?”
CHARLOTTE: “Denzel Washington should always win.”
NAOMI: “But Daniel Day-Lewis is retiring, so he needs to win!”
RICHELLE: “Daniel Kaluuya because he’s the hottest one on the list.”
ALLI: “Daniel Kaluuya, because eff all y’all.”
KEELY: “What about the fish from The Shape Of Water?”

Best Actress

ALLI: “I’m gonna say Frances McDormand.”
RICHELLE: “Same.”
KEVIN: “They’re gonna give it to Margaret Robbie.” (Her name is Margot.)
CHARLOTTE: “Saoirse Ronan. It’s good to see a fresh face up there.”
KEELY: “Margot Robbie is perfect.”

Supporting Actor

KEVIN: “I haven’t seen any of these. Damn.”
CHARLOTTE: “Get a MoviePass!”
NAOMI: “Definitely Willem Dafoe. The Florida Project should have been nominated over The Post.”
RICHELLE: “I’m gonna go with Sam Rockwell. The scene of him not realizing the police station he was in was on fire was amazing.”
ALLI: “I’m gonna say Woody Harrelson.”

Supporting Actress

KEVIN: “Mary J. Blige. I’m just gonna say it.”
NAOMI: “Octavia Spencer!”
KEELY: “Laurie Metcalf reminded me of my mom.”
CHARLOTTE: “I could go with Laurie Metcalf.”

Director

CHARLOTTE: “Lady Bird! Greta Gerwig definitely, hands down.”
KEVIN: “Jordan Peele.”
RICHELLE: “Jordan Peele. I mean, Christopher Nolan. Dunkirk.”
NAOMI: “I just feel like Christopher Nolan’s going to win.”

Animated Feature

NAOMI: “Coco!”
KEVIN: “I can’t believe Boss Baby is on there.”
CHARLOTTE: “I heard it’s pretty good, though. My sister said it’s about pets.”
KEELY: “Coco should win best director.”

Adapted Screenplay

NAOMI: “Molly’s Game.”
KEVIN: “Is Logan that superhero movie? I’ll go with that one.”
CHARLOTTE: “Logan was last year? I felt like it was longer ago.”
RICHELLE: “Call Me By Your Name.”
ALLI: “I’m gonna say Logan, because why not. That came out this year?”

Original Screenplay

KEELY: “I’m mad that The Post wasn’t nominated, even though Naomi fell asleep.”
KEVIN: “Get Out.”
ALLI: “Yes, Get Out!”
RICHELLE: “I’m surprised The Big Sick is on there. I feel like people stopped talking about it.”
CHARLOTTE: “I can’t believe The Shape Of Water was not a remake. It reminded me of old-school monster movies!”

Cinematography

ALLI: “Blade Runner! Blade Runner!”
NAOMI: “Shape of Water.”
KEELY: “I haven’t seen any of these!”
RICHELLE: “Shape of Water, because I haven’t seen the other ones.”
CHARLOTTE: “Dunkirk looked really good.”

Film Editing

NAOMI: “I kind of liked the editing in I, Tonya, actually.”
KEELY: “Me too.”
ALLI: “Where have I come from? Where am I going? Sorry, what’s the question?”
CHARLOTTE: “I wish I had seen these movies more recently.”

Production Design

NAOMI: “Shape of Water.”
KEVIN: “Blade Runner.”
ALLI: “I could go for that.”
CHARLOTTE: “For me, The Shape Of Water. Why wasn't it nominated for makeup and hair?”
RICHELLE: “Dunkirk. Wait, that’s an option?”

Original Song

NAOMI: “'Mystery Of Love'. That’s my favorite; I listen to it all the time. And Sufjan Stevens went to the New School in 2001.”
RICHELLE: “I wasn’t even alive in 2001.” (Richelle is in her mid-twenties.)
KEELY: “I vote 'Remember Me', because—“
CHARLOTTE: “Because it’s going to win.”
RICHELLE: “Can I change my answer to Dunkirk?”